Post by kenzie on Jan 10, 2009 2:36:40 GMT -5
So here it was, a handful of days away from Malice Effect and not a single Valkyrie has made any comments about their upcoming gauntlet. Sad sight actually, but what can you do? The guys have been showing the ladies up the last couple weeks. What a disgrace. The Valkyries are just as important and intimidating as the gents. The cameras are roaming around backstage looking for something, some one....anyone....and they get it. Our beloved Kenzie is walking into the arena. Her braids hiding the ear buds placed in her ears. The cord runs down her black hoodie and into the ipod she has in the front pocket, along with her hands. She slides her hands out of her hoodie pocket into her jeans. The black boots on her feet silence her steps making Kenzie very stealth like. Passing right by her locker room she heads straight for the ring area. Pulling out her ear buds and slipped them into her hoodie pocket. Not long after Head Like A Hole by Nine Inch Nails starts playing. The fans erupt as Kenzie walks out onto the stage and climbs into the ring. She pulls a microphone out of her hoodie pocket and begins to speak.
Kenzie - You know I sat at home, at the hotel, backstage, AND at the hospital trying to think up some cute clever way to completely tarnish and be little my fellow Valkyries in this Gauntlet match for the women’s title. The worst part is, I couldn't come up with anything. Not from lack of effort. Not from having my brain nearing pouring out my nose from the attack I suffered by the Punisher. Definitely not because of the lack of ammunition. Any idiot could see there is plenty of that.
She lowers the mic for a moment and paces around the ring. Letting things stir in her head for a few moments. God only knows what's really going on in there.
Kenzie - But what I realized is, I don't NEED to do anything cute. Any over the top, subtle subliminal message, dramatic scenery...none of that is needed. Because quite frankly, I'd much rather save the antics, for some one, or some ones, who actually deserve a little time and acknowledgement. Right now Jennah, Randii, Angelica, and Zero don't deserve jack from me. But, for the complete sake of 'why the hell not,' let's break these ladies down a bit shall we? We have Angelica Hardy...Dumas...whichever one of the sisters she is. I do have a question about her. Can come one please tell me why they have different last names? There is no word, no history or anything of either of them being or having been married. What happened? Did one of them wake up one day and just suddenly decide, "Hey I think I am going to change my last name. It will make me way cooler and it will make us that much more extreme if we are rip off's of Matt and Jeff Hardy and the slutbag that is Lita." Why the hell didn't I think of that!!! Maybe I should change my last name. Wait...does anyone even remember my last name? Yeah I didn't think so. So Maybe I will just adopt the last name of let's see who would be good...hmm... I got it! Kenzie Taker! Wait no that doesn't work. Kenzie Burchill. Yeah I think I will pass on forever being linked to incest. Maybe I could pull out the double first name. Kenzie Kenzie.
Kenzie smirks a little bit and then cheeses it for the camera ala Stewie Griffin.
Kenzie - The Dumas....Hardy...whatever won her shot at the title and hasn't been seen or heard from since....Always very promising. THEN you have Zero DeLuca. Who I'm not sure if she's just culturally ignorant, or just a special ed escapee. She's been around what....twice? Three times max maybe? "Services" Psycho Luke long enough to get herself into the battle royal. She happened to show up, and well, we all know how THAT disaster happened. Zero doesn't do anything, she doesn't show up around the place. God only knows how the hell she messes that up, I'm sure our American customs are much to confusing for the poor girl.
Kenzie shakes her head a little bit and smiles.
Kenzie - Pathetic you know? Not a damn one of the Valkyries in this match have been seen in weeks! Hell not a damn one of the Valkyries lately have been seen in weeks. You go away for a little vacation and come back to find your whole division that you built from the ground up, since day one has completely and utterly fallen apart! Honestly this is completely ridiculous. The only thing anyone seems to care about anymore is their own ego or getting laid! This is like a God damn cheesy teen soap. Since when did CWF become the Hills....or whatever the hell that damn show on MTV is. We are fully of petty cliques. The rappers trying to take over and show they are more than a bunch of guys who should be locked up in prison for writing crappy music. The metal heads who well by some standards could be imprisoned for the same thing. The bitchy women who are ego and materialistic, pompous and wanna be celebrities. This is sickening. This is CWF. It's supposed to be the land of chaos! Where everything and everyone is running around getting at each other. Where Psycho Luke can sit back and feel at home. Where the crazies don't feel like crazies and CJ FUCKING TYLER IS NOT GETTING A SHOT AT THE WORLD TITLE! WHAT THE HELL MAN! What's worse than all of that, well okay...maybe not worse, because CJ getting a title shot is pretty bad....but bad none-the-less....is the fact that I HANDED a woman the Women's title. I gave it to her to see, 'okay, maybe with a nice swift kick in the ass we can get the ball rolling with a whole new generation of Valkyries.' But what happens? That very gesture is what turned around and bit me in the ass. I'd show you the bite marks...but you'd have a hard time telling which ones came from Tweeks and which ones came from that action.
Kenzie stops to take a breath and shakes her head a little bit.
Kenzie - Jennah single handedly ruin everything I have worked so fucking hard for. To bring this division into something reputable. Something with standards, something to show that women aren't just little "divas" who parade around half naked. That we can go toe to toe and put on some of the damn best matches equal to or better than some of the shit the guys do. But what does she do with the title? She uses that big ass paycheck to pop onto some Jenny Craig and shrink her own fat ass. She ruined the title and everything it stood for. Not doing a God damn thing since winning it. Treating it and the company she started in as if it was nothing more than a bum on the sidewalk. The only thing I can say to that, is that you don’t deserve to be in this business. You don’t deserve to have the opportunities that you now have. Do something worth a fuck and maybe just MAYBE you will get some God damn respect shown to you. If that doesn’t work for you, then why don’t you find some “mofo” to flaunt around with, or I suppose there is always those cyber whores you could associate yourself with…
The crowd gives her a little bit of a mixed reaction. Kenzie obviously doesn’t seem to give a shit. She’s in one hell of a pissy mood and doesn’t care who knows it. If they don’t like what she has to say, then they can just do something about it.
Kenzie – Now, we have come to our wonderful conclusion of this little story. Randii Todd. Ya know, I almost could say she’s slightly attempting to rip off yours truly. But then I realize, she doesn’t nearly have the attitude down. I haven’t been around long…but I’ve been through and adapted to more in my few years than she could imagine. I will say she has made one very smart move. A few hours ago I heard a little rumor circulating that Miss Todd told CJ Tyler to basically take his offer and shove it up his ass. Now THAT is a smart girl. So I will give her a nod for that. CJ Tyler is never some one you want to be associated with. Hopefully soon Randii’s boyfriend…ex-boyfriend….questionable relationship man will see that one CJ Tyler, is no better of an associate than Lance Khaos! So Randii, I applaud you for having seen just what CJ Tyler is, and for having the nerve to stand up and say it. Just remember, that doesn’t mean I won’t kick the shit out of you if given the chance at Malice Effect.
Kenzie walks back to the center of the ring and sighs heavily.
Kenzie – The lesson here my little creepies…Kenzie is in a VERY pissy mood. She doesn’t care who she pisses off anymore. She gets paid to beat the living hell out of Valkyries who can’t seem to form a sentence. That’s exactly what she is going to do. This isn’t about ego. This isn’t about personal vendettas. This is just straight up disgust with the way things are going. Why bitch about it, when I can fucking do something about it? Malice Effect can now be considered, Valkyrie damage control.
Kenzie drops the microphone, the loud thud and buzz echo through out the arena as she drops down on the mat and rolls out of the ring.
Kenzie - You know I sat at home, at the hotel, backstage, AND at the hospital trying to think up some cute clever way to completely tarnish and be little my fellow Valkyries in this Gauntlet match for the women’s title. The worst part is, I couldn't come up with anything. Not from lack of effort. Not from having my brain nearing pouring out my nose from the attack I suffered by the Punisher. Definitely not because of the lack of ammunition. Any idiot could see there is plenty of that.
She lowers the mic for a moment and paces around the ring. Letting things stir in her head for a few moments. God only knows what's really going on in there.
Kenzie - But what I realized is, I don't NEED to do anything cute. Any over the top, subtle subliminal message, dramatic scenery...none of that is needed. Because quite frankly, I'd much rather save the antics, for some one, or some ones, who actually deserve a little time and acknowledgement. Right now Jennah, Randii, Angelica, and Zero don't deserve jack from me. But, for the complete sake of 'why the hell not,' let's break these ladies down a bit shall we? We have Angelica Hardy...Dumas...whichever one of the sisters she is. I do have a question about her. Can come one please tell me why they have different last names? There is no word, no history or anything of either of them being or having been married. What happened? Did one of them wake up one day and just suddenly decide, "Hey I think I am going to change my last name. It will make me way cooler and it will make us that much more extreme if we are rip off's of Matt and Jeff Hardy and the slutbag that is Lita." Why the hell didn't I think of that!!! Maybe I should change my last name. Wait...does anyone even remember my last name? Yeah I didn't think so. So Maybe I will just adopt the last name of let's see who would be good...hmm... I got it! Kenzie Taker! Wait no that doesn't work. Kenzie Burchill. Yeah I think I will pass on forever being linked to incest. Maybe I could pull out the double first name. Kenzie Kenzie.
Kenzie smirks a little bit and then cheeses it for the camera ala Stewie Griffin.
Kenzie - The Dumas....Hardy...whatever won her shot at the title and hasn't been seen or heard from since....Always very promising. THEN you have Zero DeLuca. Who I'm not sure if she's just culturally ignorant, or just a special ed escapee. She's been around what....twice? Three times max maybe? "Services" Psycho Luke long enough to get herself into the battle royal. She happened to show up, and well, we all know how THAT disaster happened. Zero doesn't do anything, she doesn't show up around the place. God only knows how the hell she messes that up, I'm sure our American customs are much to confusing for the poor girl.
Kenzie shakes her head a little bit and smiles.
Kenzie - Pathetic you know? Not a damn one of the Valkyries in this match have been seen in weeks! Hell not a damn one of the Valkyries lately have been seen in weeks. You go away for a little vacation and come back to find your whole division that you built from the ground up, since day one has completely and utterly fallen apart! Honestly this is completely ridiculous. The only thing anyone seems to care about anymore is their own ego or getting laid! This is like a God damn cheesy teen soap. Since when did CWF become the Hills....or whatever the hell that damn show on MTV is. We are fully of petty cliques. The rappers trying to take over and show they are more than a bunch of guys who should be locked up in prison for writing crappy music. The metal heads who well by some standards could be imprisoned for the same thing. The bitchy women who are ego and materialistic, pompous and wanna be celebrities. This is sickening. This is CWF. It's supposed to be the land of chaos! Where everything and everyone is running around getting at each other. Where Psycho Luke can sit back and feel at home. Where the crazies don't feel like crazies and CJ FUCKING TYLER IS NOT GETTING A SHOT AT THE WORLD TITLE! WHAT THE HELL MAN! What's worse than all of that, well okay...maybe not worse, because CJ getting a title shot is pretty bad....but bad none-the-less....is the fact that I HANDED a woman the Women's title. I gave it to her to see, 'okay, maybe with a nice swift kick in the ass we can get the ball rolling with a whole new generation of Valkyries.' But what happens? That very gesture is what turned around and bit me in the ass. I'd show you the bite marks...but you'd have a hard time telling which ones came from Tweeks and which ones came from that action.
Kenzie stops to take a breath and shakes her head a little bit.
Kenzie - Jennah single handedly ruin everything I have worked so fucking hard for. To bring this division into something reputable. Something with standards, something to show that women aren't just little "divas" who parade around half naked. That we can go toe to toe and put on some of the damn best matches equal to or better than some of the shit the guys do. But what does she do with the title? She uses that big ass paycheck to pop onto some Jenny Craig and shrink her own fat ass. She ruined the title and everything it stood for. Not doing a God damn thing since winning it. Treating it and the company she started in as if it was nothing more than a bum on the sidewalk. The only thing I can say to that, is that you don’t deserve to be in this business. You don’t deserve to have the opportunities that you now have. Do something worth a fuck and maybe just MAYBE you will get some God damn respect shown to you. If that doesn’t work for you, then why don’t you find some “mofo” to flaunt around with, or I suppose there is always those cyber whores you could associate yourself with…
The crowd gives her a little bit of a mixed reaction. Kenzie obviously doesn’t seem to give a shit. She’s in one hell of a pissy mood and doesn’t care who knows it. If they don’t like what she has to say, then they can just do something about it.
Kenzie – Now, we have come to our wonderful conclusion of this little story. Randii Todd. Ya know, I almost could say she’s slightly attempting to rip off yours truly. But then I realize, she doesn’t nearly have the attitude down. I haven’t been around long…but I’ve been through and adapted to more in my few years than she could imagine. I will say she has made one very smart move. A few hours ago I heard a little rumor circulating that Miss Todd told CJ Tyler to basically take his offer and shove it up his ass. Now THAT is a smart girl. So I will give her a nod for that. CJ Tyler is never some one you want to be associated with. Hopefully soon Randii’s boyfriend…ex-boyfriend….questionable relationship man will see that one CJ Tyler, is no better of an associate than Lance Khaos! So Randii, I applaud you for having seen just what CJ Tyler is, and for having the nerve to stand up and say it. Just remember, that doesn’t mean I won’t kick the shit out of you if given the chance at Malice Effect.
Kenzie walks back to the center of the ring and sighs heavily.
Kenzie – The lesson here my little creepies…Kenzie is in a VERY pissy mood. She doesn’t care who she pisses off anymore. She gets paid to beat the living hell out of Valkyries who can’t seem to form a sentence. That’s exactly what she is going to do. This isn’t about ego. This isn’t about personal vendettas. This is just straight up disgust with the way things are going. Why bitch about it, when I can fucking do something about it? Malice Effect can now be considered, Valkyrie damage control.
Kenzie drops the microphone, the loud thud and buzz echo through out the arena as she drops down on the mat and rolls out of the ring.